Posted by Brian Beckner on Feb 3, 2010

Breaking News: Kevin O’Neill Didn’t Kill a Guy #USC

You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.

By Brian Beckner:

USC men’s basketball coach Kevin O’Neill will eventually die on the sideline. If you’ve seen the guy coach, then you understand. From the moment the ball is tipped until the final horn mercifully blows, dude looks like a slightly more animated version of Sam Kinison. His face is a color that although resembling purple is not technically a tone that nature has ever reproduced. Somebody check the guy’s blood pressure because all ten pints currently appear to be residing in his face. USC never has to worry about home court advantage because no hostile crowd could duplicate the decibel level of their own coach. Not that O’Neill likes to yell, but every time he opens his mouth Jeff Van Gundy’s car flies away. Southern Cal doesn’t need athletic trainers, they need crisis counselors. The team currently has at least two players sidelined with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Nitroglycerine is less volatile. Mount Pinatubo has a milder temper. A scale has yet to be invented that could measure the depths of this guy’s rage. Pray he does not own a dog as it would be getting kicked often.

O'Neill relaxing at a recent game.

Imagine for a minute what it would be like to play for this guy? What if a player did something stupid that cost his team the game? O’Neill’s rage could conceivably implode the entire Galen Center. Now imagine doing something to cost the Trojans a victory and not even being a player on the team. Meet Stan Holt.

From the Los Angeles Times:

Then USC's Kevin O'Neill left the bowels of McArthur Court, still shocked -- not that the Trojans lost to Oregon, 67-57, Saturday, but that they lost their chances of winning when a student manager was called for a technical foul late in a tight game.

The call came with 4 minutes 35 seconds left and Oregon leading, 49-47. Stan Holt, a third-year manager, was deemed responsible.

"The referee told me he was screaming obscenities at him," O'Neill said. "That's on me and that will be rectified. It already has been. He's gone. If somebody's getting a technical foul, it's going to be me."

Good luck Stan, although at this point you hopefully have a new name, face and identity. Assuming you survived the immediate aftermath, let’s hope you immediately took it on the lam and have subsequently landed in the witness protection program. What exactly made you think you could scream obscenities at the referee? Did you momentarily trade your cardinal and gold for silver and black? You’re the team manager, a glorified groupie, keep the towels coming and your mouth shut. Do you realize the team you work (volunteer?) for is coached by a man consumed by constant rage?

O’Neill is easily one of the scariest coaches in the NCAA, but the guy does have quite a bit on his plate. As if playing out the string under NCAA sanctions in his first year at USC wasn’t bad enough, now he’s got team managers drawing technical fouls in tight games?

Luckily Holt was only fired for his lapse in judgment and hopefully he’s learned a lesson. Let’s hope that when he gets another gig he shows a little more restraint. Nobody wants to be shouted at by the Kinkos kid “these are COLLATED, idiot!” Maybe he has a future as a sandwich artist “what do you mean you want it toasted?” God forbid he chooses the clergy “that’s 27,000 Hail Marys and three hours of self-flagellation.” With his temper and passion for basketball maybe he has a future in coaching? If only he could get a break with a big time college program somewhere?