Jessica Curry has stepped down as head of The Chinese Room, the developer behind Dear Esther and Everybody’s Gone to the Rapture, and she explained her departure in a candid blog post about her illness and her negative experience working with a publisher.

Curry explained that she suffers from a degenerative illness that will get progressively worse, and it will only make work more and more difficult as time goes on.

“I pushed myself to the edge of a precipice on Everybody’s Gone to the Rapture– I thought if I kept running then I could always keep the disease just out of reach. I was so wrong,” Curry said. “In June I got very ill. I was in L.A. working on the final mix of the game and I got so poorly that I genuinely thought I was going to be brought home in a coffin. It forced me to re-evaluate what the hell I was doing to myself, and more importantly the effect I was having on my husband and son. I can’t keep running and it’s time to admit that to myself and to everyone who loves me.”

“Big business and the creation of art have always been extremely uncomfortable bedfellows”

While her illness may be the leading factor behind her departure from the studio, Curry said that another factor was the intensely negative experience she had working with a publisher on Everybody’s Gone to the Rapture, which was published by Sony Computer Entertainment.

“Big business and the creation of art have always been extremely uncomfortable bedfellows and making Rapture proved to be no exception for me,” Curry said.

In order to avoid harming the people still working at The Chinese Room, Curry would not go into detail about her problems working with the publisher, but she described it as a “toxic relationship.”

“I’ve heard so many people say, ‘well, this is just the way publishers are’ and ‘this is just what the games industry is like,’ ” she added. “What I would say to that is while we all keep accepting this, while we are so afraid to challenge this behaviour, then it won’t change and we all deserve nothing but the meager crumbs we are thrown.”

“Publishers on first meeting have automatically assumed that my producer is my boss just because he’s a man”

Curry explained that her final reason for stepping down involves the current state of the game industry itself, saying that her role in the in the studio and its games has been repeatedly downplayed by publishers and news outlets due to her gender.

“On a personal level I look back at my huge contribution to the games that we’ve made and I have had to watch Dan get the credit time and time again,” Curry said, referring to Creative Director Dan Pinchbeck, to whom she is married. “I’ve had journalists assuming I’m Dan’s PA, I have been referenced as ‘Dan Pinchbeck’s wife’ in articles, publishers on first meeting have automatically assumed that my producer is my boss just because he’s a man, one magazine would only feature Dan as Studio Head and wouldn’t include me.”

Curry admitted that Pinchbeck had become the face of the company in part because he enjoys giving talks at conventions and other events, but she also expressed her disappointment in not receiving credit for many of her ideas.

“This is not a rejection of [Dan] but of the society that still can’t cope with the fact that a woman might just be as talented as the man she shares her life with,” Curry said.

While Curry will no longer lead The Chinese Room, she said that she will continue to be involved in the company and compose music for its games.

“Everybody’s Gone to the Rapture” image courtesy of The Chinese Room